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Okay—if your relationship feels stuck in a loop of arguments that never resolve, know that everything shifted for the better in my partnership when we...
Some of the messages that appear on my YouTube channel are fascinating — occasionally warm and thoughtful, and at other times they provoke a strong...
The blunt truth is this: trying to force an emotionally avoidant person into full commitment is a losing strategy. Chasing someone who withdraws from intimacy...
Experiencing abuse and neglect as a child can leave you convinced that you must manage everyone’s emotions wherever you go. If your family is unhappy,...
People often mix things up: you can establish boundaries, but you cannot compel others to honor them. Surprising, yes — many of us have tried...
Stop immediately. Put the phone down. Stop re-reading old conversations. Stop scrolling through their profile. And stop torturing yourself with the question of what you...
there’s always a risk when you take part in 12-step groups or join online meetings made up of people who are there because they have...
They vanish when you least expect it. One day they’re warm, engaging, and saying all the right things; the next day there is only quiet....
Why is it always the anxious partner who ends up adjusting for the avoidant? What do you mean by “adjusting”? I mean it’s constantly the...
Anxious attachment wrecked nearly every romantic relationship I’ve been in. I was convinced that closeness meant always putting someone else’s feelings and needs before my...
They walked away and left you feeling like you’ve been hit with emotional whiplash — one moment you were their closest confidant, the next you...
Avoidant men often project an image of being unbothered — composed, aloof, untouchable. Yet this apparent indifference is not strength; it’s avoidance rooted in fear:...
Have you ever known you ought to do something—get to work on time, put away laundry, finish a creative piece, or even brush your teeth...
There’s a common idea that people squander whatever they have in surplus — whether it’s food, money, time, or health. When something is plentiful, it’s...
They didn’t capture you with grand vows; they held you captive with their absence. Not by what they offered, but by what they refused to...
A few years back I asked Emily whether she had ever gone along with something sexual with me when she actually didn’t want to, and...
They left without warmth. No tears. No memorable farewell. Just a wall of silence, blocks, unfollows, disappearance. It feels as if you never mattered. Your...
You were raised to believe that love equals betrayal, that being cheated on is commonplace, and that casual hookups are not only acceptable but safer...
Many people who have survived traumatic experiences end up surrounded by excess stuff, and because clutter can hold you back, it’s empowering when you find...
The most genuinely powerful people I’ve encountered were quietly kind. They weren’t trying to please everyone or easily pushed around. They were centered, direct, and...
Grief isn’t reserved only for deaths. If your childhood was marked by trauma, grief can arrive when you finally grasp that the childhood you needed—more...
The paradox of emotional unavailability is that you can close yourself off so completely that you lose the awareness that you’re shut down in the...
Let’s be honest for a moment: being rejected hurts. It bites. Whether it’s a job you wanted, a friendship, or a relationship you invested in,...
To be honest, I’m embarrassed when I look back at the times people treated me badly and, instead of removing myself from the situation, I...
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