이리나 주라블레바

The quickest way to undermine a relationship is to ignore what it requires to thrive. When people say, “You shouldn’t have needs in a relationship,”...

Okay — how can you tell if someone is a narcissist or simply an avoidantly attached person, and what should you do if you’re in...

A few days ago a post explored how shutting down or stonewalling during an argument can leave a partner feeling unheard, isolated, and even abandoned,...

If the word “space” keeps popping up in your relationships, this material is aimed at you. What people commonly lump together as avoidant attachment is...

Today my aim is to transform how you handle conflict in your close relationships. We’re not talking about “punching” fights away — rather, we’re going...

One night I was called into the hospital and found a man suffering a massive heart attack. We fought to save him for a long...

Even rats become obsessed when rewards and care are repeatedly mixed with cruelty and isolation, so it’s not surprising that people raised with trauma often...

All right — the aim here is to help resolve the conflicts that are eroding your relationship. It may sound ambitious, but this is worth...

Nearly everyone who reaches out here to the Crappy Childhood Fairy describes having been invisible or misunderstood by their caregivers. Whether through neglect, substance use,...

My fear of being left in the future led me to abandon my own needs in the here and now. I constantly put everyone else...

You’re having an ordinary conversation and someone drops a small comment — “don’t be so sensitive,” “you’re overreacting,” or the one that lands like a...

About 30% of couples — whether dating or married — report experiencing some form of infidelity, and that number only reflects what’s been disclosed. After...

Growing up with trauma affects each person differently, yet the patterns of symptoms that can surface later in life are strikingly similar for many of...

Nothing scrambles your mind or wounds you more than trying to maintain any kind of relationship with someone who behaves narcissistically — the gaslighting, the...

Believe me from hard-won experience: destroying a marriage is almost always much easier than rebuilding one. It takes far less effort to let a relationship...

All right — here’s a very simple way to approach relationship advice: ask yourself one question. Do you feel stuck? Does it seem like no...

A lot of people misunderstand avoidance: they assume pulling away is a sign of strength, that detachment equals confidence. In reality, avoidant withdrawal is not...

Among the warning signs I’ve learned to spot, one in particular always makes my alarm bells ring: when an adult claims they never want to...

There’s a pattern that comes from trauma where people move through life without ever truly committing to anything long-term — relationships, careers, communities, even the...

저를 흥미롭게 하고 동시에 불안하게 만드는 것은 타인들을 통제하고 조작하려는 사람들이 본능적으로... 사람들의 마음을 사로잡는 방법을 이해하는 것 같습니다.

갑자기 명명하기 어려운 변화를 느껴본 적이 있나요? 한 순간에는 당신과 사귐이 따뜻하고 생생하게 느껴지는데 — 실제적인 교감, 만질 수 있는 가능성이 느껴져요. 당신은...

나는 데이트하는 사람이 나르시시스트인지 알려줄 수 있는 간단한 체크리스트가 있어야 한다고 계속 생각한다 — 그것은...

당신이 숭배하는 사람을 바라보며 당신의 말이 공허로 녹아내리는 것을 느낀 적이 있습니까? 당신은 친밀감의 어떤 표적이라도, 어떤...

우리가 파트너를 자기애성 성격 장애자로 규정하려고 너무 많은 에너지를 낭비하는 것보다 단순히 특정 행동이 용납할 수 없다는 것을 인정하는 것이 옳다고 생각합니다. 결국...