Irina Zhuravleva

You follow every piece of advice you’re given—go to therapy, practice breathing, stay optimistic, exercise, repeat affirmations, be gentle with others, grieve, honor your feelings—yet...

Pay attention, because this may sound counterintuitive at first: the quickest way to stop letting an avoidant partner — the one who flees closeness, shuts...

If you grew up with trauma, you already know how past experiences can resurface and set off thoughts, reactions and habits that undermine your performance...

Listen: I can’t fix a relationship unless both partners agree to a shared set of principles and values. If even one person refuses to live...

Pleasing others will almost certainly wreck your relationships — and many of you are guilty of it. You might ask: Jimmy, how do I tell...

A people-pleaser is someone who suppresses their genuine reactions during interactions, abandoning their own choices about what to do, what to say, and who to...

If you have feelings for someone but keep them hidden because you know they aren’t really available, pretending it’s “just friendship,” don’t be astonished when...

From reading hundreds of letters sent by people who follow this channel, certain patterns emerge. One particularly worrying indicator that someone is deteriorating in an...

That sickening twist in your stomach when someone you love — someone you’ve been pouring effort into — suddenly acts as though you don’t matter:...

There is a nearly universal, powerful trigger for symptoms of childhood PTSD — and chances are you experience it. Many people do, not only those...

When we discuss trauma, we often concentrate on the outward expressions — the outbursts, the acting out — but there’s another way trauma steers your...

What ultimately undoes an anxious–avoidant pair is rarely a deficit of affection. Both people would probably insist they care deeply for one another. The real...

When an entire family turns on one of its members, it is a profoundly harmful form of abuse. Sometimes this takes the shape of scapegoating,...

People often remain in harmful relationships because the mistreatment is not constant. In trauma bonds especially, a pattern of unpredictable kindness and cruelty conditions the...

Imagine if you began responding to them exactly as they respond to you. Imagine if you invested in this relationship only to the same degree...

Sometimes silence speaks louder than any shout. It does not scream, chase, or beg; it simply exists. Yet everything can shift when someone who habitually...

Love itself doesn’t cause pain. People who haven’t learned how to love do. Sit with that for a second. If you have ever been in...

When a disagreement turns into your partner being critical, how should you respond? First, it helps to recognise that criticism and complaint are not the...

Discover how well you know your partner with fun questions, quizzes, and tips to boost connection and nurture your relationship.

There are everyday behaviors you repeat without noticing that quietly undermine your relationships, your self-esteem, and the life you could have. These aren’t dramatic meltdowns...

The hard truth is that roughly one out of every three romantic partnerships will face some form of infidelity — that’s the bleak part. The...

How many times have you asked for something that should have been simple and reasonable, only for it to erupt into another argument where they...

If you want to recover from the wounds left by childhood trauma, you will find yourself in a confrontation between forces that feel like good...

The quickest way to undermine a relationship is to ignore what it requires to thrive. When people say, “You shouldn’t have needs in a relationship,”...