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When your attachment is anxious and insecure, and a partner tells you, “I don’t want to be with you anymore,” yet you cling more tightly,...
Anxious attachment wrecked nearly every romantic relationship I’ve been in. I was convinced that closeness meant always putting someone else’s feelings and needs before my...
Why is it always the anxious partner who ends up adjusting for the avoidant? What do you mean by “adjusting”? I mean it’s constantly the...
They vanish when you least expect it. One day they’re warm, engaging, and saying all the right things; the next day there is only quiet....
there’s always a risk when you take part in 12-step groups or join online meetings made up of people who are there because they have...
Stop immediately. Put the phone down. Stop re-reading old conversations. Stop scrolling through their profile. And stop torturing yourself with the question of what you...
People often mix things up: you can establish boundaries, but you cannot compel others to honor them. Surprising, yes — many of us have tried...
Experiencing abuse and neglect as a child can leave you convinced that you must manage everyone’s emotions wherever you go. If your family is unhappy,...
The blunt truth is this: trying to force an emotionally avoidant person into full commitment is a losing strategy. Chasing someone who withdraws from intimacy...
Some of the messages that appear on my YouTube channel are fascinating — occasionally warm and thoughtful, and at other times they provoke a strong...
They walked away and left you feeling like you’ve been hit with emotional whiplash — one moment you were their closest confidant, the next you...
回避型の男性は、気にならないかのように装うことがよくあります — 落ち着いていて、よそよそしく、手の届かない存在のように。しかし、この一見した無関心は強さではなく、恐れに基づいた回避です...
Grief isn’t reserved only for deaths. If your childhood was marked by trauma, grief can arrive when you finally grasp that the childhood you needed—more...
The most genuinely powerful people I’ve encountered were quietly kind. They weren’t trying to please everyone or easily pushed around. They were centered, direct, and...
Many people who have survived traumatic experiences end up surrounded by excess stuff, and because clutter can hold you back, it’s empowering when you find...
You were raised to believe that love equals betrayal, that being cheated on is commonplace, and that casual hookups are not only acceptable but safer...
They left without warmth. No tears. No memorable farewell. Just a wall of silence, blocks, unfollows, disappearance. It feels as if you never mattered. Your...
A few years back I asked Emily whether she had ever gone along with something sexual with me when she actually didn’t want to, and...
They didn’t capture you with grand vows; they held you captive with their absence. Not by what they offered, but by what they refused to...
There’s a common idea that people squander whatever they have in surplus — whether it’s food, money, time, or health. When something is plentiful, it’s...
Have you ever known you ought to do something—get to work on time, put away laundry, finish a creative piece, or even brush your teeth...
養育者が、愛情、注意、安全への欲求が食事、呼吸、水分補給と同じくらい重要である子供を見落とすのは、本当に心を痛めます。もしあなたが…
トラウマについて教え始めた頃、私は子どもの虐待やネグレクトの最も持続的で特徴的な結果の1つが…になることを想像もしていませんでした。
ロマンチックな関係の初期段階—特に長期間の孤独の後や、真に愛されることが決してないのではないかと恐れているとき—は、すべてを飲み込むような感覚になることがあります.....
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