イリーナ・ジュラヴレヴァ

The quickest way to undermine a relationship is to ignore what it requires to thrive. When people say, “You shouldn’t have needs in a relationship,”...

Okay — how can you tell if someone is a narcissist or simply an avoidantly attached person, and what should you do if you’re in...

A few days ago a post explored how shutting down or stonewalling during an argument can leave a partner feeling unheard, isolated, and even abandoned,...

If the word “space” keeps popping up in your relationships, this material is aimed at you. What people commonly lump together as avoidant attachment is...

Today my aim is to transform how you handle conflict in your close relationships. We’re not talking about “punching” fights away — rather, we’re going...

One night I was called into the hospital and found a man suffering a massive heart attack. We fought to save him for a long...

Even rats become obsessed when rewards and care are repeatedly mixed with cruelty and isolation, so it’s not surprising that people raised with trauma often...

All right — the aim here is to help resolve the conflicts that are eroding your relationship. It may sound ambitious, but this is worth...

Nearly everyone who reaches out here to the Crappy Childhood Fairy describes having been invisible or misunderstood by their caregivers. Whether through neglect, substance use,...

未来に取り残されることへの恐れが、今の自分のニーズを放棄することに繋がった。私は常に他の人々の…

You’re having an ordinary conversation and someone drops a small comment — “don’t be so sensitive,” “you’re overreacting,” or the one that lands like a...

About 30% of couples — whether dating or married — report experiencing some form of infidelity, and that number only reflects what’s been disclosed. After...

Growing up with trauma affects each person differently, yet the patterns of symptoms that can surface later in life are strikingly similar for many of...

Nothing scrambles your mind or wounds you more than trying to maintain any kind of relationship with someone who behaves narcissistically — the gaslighting, the...

Believe me from hard-won experience: destroying a marriage is almost always much easier than rebuilding one. It takes far less effort to let a relationship...

All right — here’s a very simple way to approach relationship advice: ask yourself one question. Do you feel stuck? Does it seem like no...

A lot of people misunderstand avoidance: they assume pulling away is a sign of strength, that detachment equals confidence. In reality, avoidant withdrawal is not...

Among the warning signs I’ve learned to spot, one in particular always makes my alarm bells ring: when an adult claims they never want to...

There’s a pattern that comes from trauma where people move through life without ever truly committing to anything long-term — relationships, careers, communities, even the...

One thing that both intrigues and alarms me is how those who seek to control and manipulate others seem to instinctively recognize that people with...

Have you ever noticed that sudden, hard-to-name change? One minute the atmosphere between you feels warm and alive — real connection, tangible possibility. You feel...

I keep thinking there ought to be a simple checklist to tell you if the person you’re dating is a narcissist — that would be...

Have you ever stared at someone you adore and felt like your words were dissolving into emptiness? You reach for any sign of intimacy, any...

I think we waste too much energy trying to label our partner as a narcissist instead of simply acknowledging that certain behaviors are unacceptable. Ultimately,...