إيرينا زورافليفا

Experiencing abuse and neglect as a child can leave you convinced that you must manage everyone’s emotions wherever you go. If your family is unhappy,...

Anxious attachment wrecked nearly every romantic relationship I’ve been in. I was convinced that closeness meant always putting someone else’s feelings and needs before my...

Why is it always the anxious partner who ends up adjusting for the avoidant? What do you mean by “adjusting”? I mean it’s constantly the...

Let’s be honest for a moment: being rejected hurts. It bites. Whether it’s a job you wanted, a friendship, or a relationship you invested in,...

Okay, pay attention — if you don’t get a handle on your fears, they’ll undermine your relationship the way mine did. Consider anxious and avoidant...

Okay, correct me if I’m wrong, but it seems like when you constantly go out of your way for a partner who never returns the...

It’s heartbreaking when caregivers overlook a child whose need for affection, attention and safety is as vital as eating, breathing and drinking. If you grew...

Have you ever noticed that sudden, unsettling change — the moment lively exchanges evaporate and conversation becomes a hollow echo? When messages go unanswered and...

The paradox of emotional unavailability is that you can close yourself off so completely that you lose the awareness that you’re shut down in the...

Listen — think for a moment: did someone from your past ever make you feel like you weren’t enough before you even entered this relationship?...

Some people and certain circumstances can completely override your common sense — even if you didn’t grow up with trauma. You can be navigating life...

Have you ever found yourself among coworkers, at a gathering, or in a casual chat and felt strangely detached? As if you were going through...

The early phase of a romantic relationship—especially after a long period of solitude or when you fear you may never be truly loved—can feel all-consuming....

Here’s why a regular weekly check-in can be the thing that rescues your relationship: so often we shy away from the hard conversations. Especially men...

You’ve endured enough silence in your life, haven’t you? That heavy, unsettling quiet that follows their disappearance — the rooms that still seem to echo...

May I offer a piece of advice? Don’t allow tenderness to fade from your partnership; don’t let romance fall by the wayside. You often don’t...

Alright — is this an appropriate place for me to vent? Can I safely get something off my chest? Someone left a nice comment about...

If adults you relied on betrayed you as a child, your sense of self-worth and personal boundaries can be so damaged that you become blind...

To be honest, I’m embarrassed when I look back at the times people treated me badly and, instead of removing myself from the situation, I...

Why is it that every time I mention men helping with the dishes the response always swings back to money? What does money have to...

You conclude they no longer care. You take their quiet as the final verdict. No message, no call, no sign — that must mean it’s...

Successful partnerships are not the product of chance; they are built deliberately. They don’t exist simply because you happened upon the right person — even...

When I first began teaching about trauma, I never imagined that one of the most persistent, defining consequences of childhood abuse and neglect would also...

People who genuinely love you and care about your wellbeing will pay attention to what you require from the relationship in order to feel safe,...